Saucemaster

On Saturday, I received some disappointing news. Somebody had found my phone lying in the middle of the road in Ferny Grove … after it had been run over by a car … Today I dropped it in to the nice people at Accord CCS, who are going to take it apart and let me know the prognosis. If the circuit board has been damaged then there’s nothing they can do, but otherwise … here’s hoping …

Completely unaffiliated and unrelated to Saucemaster btw…

http://saucesoft.com/

http://www.corptech.com.au/viewProject.asp?id=365

Former Spastiks guitarist L4CHL4N refused to play the garage band’s biggest hit VARSITY GIRLS at Live 8 last summer (02JUL05), because he thought the song’s misogynistic theme was inappropriate. L4CHL4N, M1RK0 and M4TT reunited with estranged bandmate R0B3RT for the first time in 7 years to perform at the Brisbane leg of the anti-poverty gig. While R0B3RT was keen for the group to perform Varsity Girls, L4CHL4N pointed out the lyrics, “Some of them are even as smart as me” and “shiny, happy people holding hands” were not suitable for the gig, which aimed to raise awareness of poverty in Africa, where many women are oppressed and uneducated. L4CHL4N explains, “(The song) was way off message. Anyway, I don’t like it much. It’s all right, but not part of the great emotional oeuvre. The songs that R0B3RT wanted were not the ones I thought we should do. The arrangements of the songs were not the way R0B3RT wanted to do them. But I kind of insisted.”

The biscuit world seems currently inundated with choice.  At my local supermarket a whole aisle is devoted to biscuits, sweet biscuits on one side savoury biscuits on the other.  Apart from satisfying those tummy rumblings that occur around 10am biscuits provide other valuable benefits:

• Fat people can get thin by eating 97% fat free bickies.
• Use a substitute for conversation when unexpected relatives drop in.
• Bond with your spouse by making them together
• Satisfy boredom by making biscuits in shapes of a phallus or goat-se replica jam drops.
• Paedophiles can use them to lure kiddies into their car; ok that wasn’t very PC and I apologise.

So what do you choose plain or cream filled?, choc flavour or choc coated?, nuts or no nuts?, expensive or cheap? 

I’m here to let you in a little secret that the saucemaster has kept close to his chest for a few years, biscuits that I myself did not know even existed until ratting through sauce’s draws a few years ago and discovering a carefully wrapped packet hidden carefully under some folders.

Ok, this is the point I intended to reveal the über bickie however I just realised that sauce may not be alone in this knowledge.  You, the very person reading this may have known the secret all along.  Maybe it was you who whispered there name into the sauce’s ear. Maybe you’ve been eating them for years.

The ‘Speculaas’ wiki, commonly known as ‘Dutch Spice Cookie’ is a relativity cheap but tasty sweet biscuit that can be found in most supermarkets.  Think of it like shortbread on steroids, having a rich taste of cinnamon, cloves & nutmeg.  Those wacky Dutch even press pictures into the biscuit providing seconds of enjoyment before consumption.  Next time you’re in the shopping aisle reject the delta cream and cast those iced vo-vo to the side, pick-up the ‘Dutch Spice Cookie’ and enjoy!